61. Grief is tiring
Dec 30, 2023You are going through life and all is well. Instantly, it all changed and you were on your knees, feeling lost with no idea how life goes on without your loved one.
Hi, I am Janet Jones, founder of Happiness Millionaire. Welcome to my conversations with my rock on the beach, Sylvia-Rose. She helps me navigate the next chapter of my life, the chapter without my 22-year-old son, Murray. Join these musings about life, grief, and loss with my rock, Sylvia-Rose. To learn why she is called Sylvia-Rose and how and why we met, I invite you to read my first blog - 'If Rocks Could Talk, Meet Sylvia-Rose'. You could also register to have these blogs delivered to your email inbox so you never miss them. Click the FOLLOW SYLVIA-ROSE button.
19th Aug, 2022
SR - Good Morning. Another beautiful day.
Jan - Morning. Yes, it is. We are blessed. The sea is making that twinkling sound.
SR - Yes. It is being gentle today. How are you doing?
Jan - I am ok. It is a day off today. I always start my days off feeling a little lost. I had to force myself out of bed today to come here. I always want to come but the mind chat that is required is crazy.
SR - Well, you made it. That is the important thing.
Jan - I used to wake up so excited to welcome a new day. Just ask my children about when I would wake them up singing, ‘Good morning’ from Singing in the rain! I have never had a problem getting up but now, especially when I am on my own, I know that when I put my foot on the floor, another day without my son has begun. He never leaves me. He sits just under the surface of my skin and he will either motivate me or bring on sadness. Which now just sits heavy on me, rather than breaks me down in tears. Those come unexpectedly.
SR - I hear you. You have done really well making it here today.
Jan - I guess so.
SR - Grief is tiring.
Jan - Grief can be truly exhausting! It also sits on you physically. I don’t think people really get that. I feel my body is still physically suffering. Since Murray died I have aching legs and hips. It feels that is part of the physical suffering.
SR - This is the first time you have mentioned that.
Jan - I didn’t think it was worth mentioning. I thought it would just ease over time. It has got worse since the third anniversary.
SR - This third anniversary has really brought the grief back, hasn’t it?
Jan - It never went away but I know what you mean. I am not fully sure where to go with this now. I am doing grief recovery with my friend Jane.
SR - How is that going?
Jan - It is too early to say, really. I better get going. I have a date!
SR - You have a date! Tell me more…
Jan - He is four, cute, and funny and we are going to bake cakes, make a den, and then go to Portpatrick.
SR - That sounds like the best date. I am jealous.
Jan - You make me laugh
SR - Glad I can help. It was lovely to meet your sisters the other day. Thank your big sister for the Rose. I see we share the same name.
Jan - You do. And with my mum too. Mum is with Murray now or Murray with mum as she left us first.
SR - So Murray has his grandma.
Jan - He does. Both of them. And his Grandads.
SR - Oh Jan, I wish I could give you a hug.
Jan - I am feeling it. I better go. I can’t keep my young man waiting. One thing I know for sure today, there will be laughter.
SR - Go and enjoy now you are out of bed!
Jan - I will. See you soon. Life is good.
SR - It is.
READ THE NEXT CONVERSATION - Stop. Your body keeps score with physical ailments - HERE