48. The twinkle of authentic joy
Dec 30, 2023You are going through life and all is well. Instantly, it all changed and you were on your knees, feeling lost with no idea how life goes on without your loved one.
Hi, I am Janet Jones, founder of Happiness Millionaire. Welcome to my conversations with my rock on the beach, Sylvia-Rose. She helps me navigate the next chapter of my life, the chapter without my 22-year-old son, Murray. Join these musings about life, grief, and loss with my rock, Sylvia-Rose. To learn why she is called Sylvia-Rose and how and why we met, I invite you to read my first blog - 'If Rocks Could Talk, Meet Sylvia-Rose'. You could also register to have these blogs delivered to your email inbox so you never miss them. Click the FOLLOW SYLVIA-ROSE button.
16th April, 2022
SR - Hey. I haven’t seen you for a couple of days.
Jan - No. I have been busy being focused on Happiness Millionaire. I never thought I would ever be doing it again. I feel I am doing this with a greater purpose this time.
SR - That is good. Sounds like the world needs happiness more than ever.
Jan - You are not kidding. I had a lovely chat with my old mate, Tayo Akinbode, the other day. We haven’t seen each other since October last year. I was doing OK in October and then there was the big emotional fall off the cliff in January and February. We were on a video call and he said he could see the twinkle in my eye. That is the twinkle of authentic joy. I have discovered that even at sad times, that twinkle is still there. I just need to tap into it.
SR - I see that twinkle too. You are permitting other people to twinkle!
Jan - That is cute to think about. Though I can’t actually do that. They must tap into their twinkle. I am making a deliberate effort with my morning routine. Oh, I have also been working on having a better relationship with food.
SR - Perhaps that has been made possible because of your morning practice balancing out your emotions.
Jan - There is no doubt in my mind that is what is behind this. The cravings have gone. Don’t get me wrong, I still love a bit of chocolate and I am looking forward to my Easter Egg tomorrow! But this new balance of emotions and the cravings going, mean I have lost over half a stone without actually trying, just following my emotions.
SR - That is great. Emotions are such a challenge for you folk.
Jan - You are not kidding. I am so fortunate to have discovered these powerful things of maintaining a morning meditation and yoga practice. That is done without fail. And when I say ‘I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me and thank you’ while doing yoga, I have been saying that to my body for abusing it over the past two and a half, nearly three, years with sugars, fats, and alcohol. People say there is nothing wrong with all of that. Well, there is if you intend to live fully, on purpose, and joyfully. That kind of food takes being fully present away. I know that because I have used that food like a drug. It felt like a drug when I intentionally stopped. The first few days I had headaches and was exhausted! I still have tiny amounts of what we call ‘treats’. There is still something comforting about them, especially when I think of my mum and dad. Mum with egg butties on Warbutons White bread and dad with his love of Malteasers. They snuggle my heart when I eat them. I don’t need them as often anymore though.
SR - That is a great turning point. Well done!
Jan - Thank You. I have also decided to say YES to everything that is in alignment with my values and who I believe I am emerging to be. I am still not quite sure who is emerging as I am still picking up the pieces. I am very choosy about which pieces I pick up and it takes time to make the right choices.
SR - That is great you have the awareness to know you have the choice of what to pick up. It sounds like you know your boundaries too.
Jan - I do. I think that is the twinkle in my eye. It is a certainty that I know I am meant to be here. Life is meant to be like this. Knowing this, I can surrender to the pain and disappointment of losing all the losses in my life, not just Murray, my parents, divorce, income, and business opportunities. I can let them all go and smile and say YES to more life, because what is there to be afraid of? I am not saying I would necessarily bungee jump, for obvious reasons. I am ready to take on life’s challenges. I am ready for them and I am ready to enjoy them. I went cycling with a group of women I had never met before. It was fun. I showed up fully. I haven’t properly been on a bike for over twenty years!
SR - This is really powerful stuff, Jan.
Jan - I know. Be careful what you wish for, as they say. I am getting chilly now. I am going to head home. I am going on a mini adventure tomorrow.
SR - I guess so. I am excited to see what you do and where you go. What are you up to tomorrow?
Jan - I will tell you more next week
SR - I can’t wait to hear about it. Have fun whatever you do.
Jan - That is now always my intention. Happy Easter.
SR - You too. Xx
READ THE NEXT CONVERSATION - Continuing traditions after the loss of a loved one - HERE